Article #1 Analysis of “Acknowledgments,” “Abstract,” and Chapter I, “Background of the Problem”

Article #1 of my analysis begins with the “Acknowledgments” and the “Abstract” at the beginning of the Sayles-Adams dissertation, then proceeds to Chapter I, “Background of the Problem,” in which the author begins a review of research literature, with emphasis on the importance of the African American female leader to the educational experience of Black students.

The following are my own analytically critical comments.

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Gary Marvin Davison Comments

Acknowledgments

Page iii

A comma is not the appropriate punctuation for placement between two independent clauses.

Hence, the appropriate punctuation for the sentence, “I would also like to acknowledge my immense support network of mentors, sister-friends, and colleagues that encouraged me to persevere and achieve this lifelong goal, you are my village,” would place either a semicolon or a colon between the words, “goal” and “you,” as follows  >>>>>

I would also like to acknowledge my immense support network of mentors, sister-friends, and colleagues that encouraged me to persevere and achieve this lifelong goal;  you are my village. 

or

I would also like to acknowledge my immense support network of mentors, sister-friends, and colleagues that encouraged me to persevere and achieve this lifelong goal:  You are my village. 

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Abstract

Gary Marvin Davison Comments

The punctuation after the word, “confirmed,” in the sentence, “The major themes that emerged were categorized as barriers that confirmed; different expectations, double standards, questioning authority, acts of resistance, aggression, and being treated as clean-up women,” is incorrect, and makes unclear the meaning. 

Either the phrase, “barriers that confirmed,” is meant to be parallel with those that follow (“double standards, questioning authority, acts of resistance, aggression, and being treated as clean-up women”), and should be succeeded by a comma (“The major themes that emerged were categorized as barriers that confirmed, different expectations, double standards, questioning authority, acts of resistance, aggression, and being treated as clean-up women.”),

or

the phrase, “barriers that confirm,” describe those phrases that follow and should be succeeded by a colon (“The major themes that emerged were categorized as barriers that confirmed:  different expectations, double standards, questioning authority, acts of resistance, aggression, and being treated as clean-up women.”)

The word, “their,” renders the phrase in which it occurs not parallel with the other phrases in this sentence.  This sentence, therefore, should read as follows:

“An additional theme that described coping strategies utilized to navigate racism and sexism in the workplace included self-advocacy and being authentic, spirituality, support networks, and concealment of emotions.” 

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Chapter I, Background of the Problem

Gary Marvin Davison Comments

Page 3

Consider this sentence:

“The Minnesota Comprehensive Assessment (MCA-III) is an additional data point in the achievement gap.

The Minnesota Comprehensive Assessment (MCA-III) is not a data point but rather an assessment, the results of which are indicative of the achievement gap.  Hence the sentence would better read as follows:                                               

Results of each year’s administration of the Minnesota Comprehensive Assessment (MCA-III) provide indication in a particular state of the nationwide achievement gap phenomenon.

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Gary Marvin Davison Comments

 

Page 5

 

If Sayles-Adams had provided any evidence at all that the five African American women principals whom she studied had demonstrated the effective leadership qualities for affecting student learning, (“(a) shaping a vision of academic success for all students; (b) creating a climate hospitable to education; (c) cultivating leadership in others; (d) improving instruction; and (e) managing people, data and processes to foster school improvement,” she would have made a significant contribution to the subject discussed.  But nowhere does Sayles-Adams cite even any claims on the part of the principals whom she interviews to have these precise leadership qualities;  much less does Sayles-Adams provide any evidence that the principals interviewed actually manifested these qualities in their leadership roles.   

 

And when Sayles-Adams cites Gordon and Doherty as suggesting that “principal preparation programs must prepare current and future school leaders for the changing educational environments and prepare principals to create the conditions needed for students to receive an equitable and excellent education” (2015, p. 226), she is illustrating the very real problem of principal preparation.   But this statement would imply that the five principals interviewed, and Sayles-Adams herself, underwent inadequate training as principals and as public education administration officials in general that weighed against their own effectiveness.

 

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Gary Marvin Davison Comments

 

Page 6

 

To be relevant to the dissertation under discussion, Sayles-Adams would need to establish that the five African American women principals interviewed  ”have demonstrated an “overall commitment to equity and social justice, academic success, creating an environment of care, and being depicted as culturally responsive servant leaders,” and to have an actual impact on student academic progress and personal well-being, the Sayles-Adams interviewees would have to demonstrate success in establishing “equity and social justice, academic success, creating an environment of care, and being depicted as culturally responsive servant leaders.”

 

The Sayles-Adams interviewees objectively demonstrate neither their commitment nor their success in bringing about student academic achievement or personal well-being.

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Gary Marvin Davison Comments

Pages 7-8

The Sayles-Adams interviewees objectively demonstrate neither their commitment nor their success in bringing about student academic achievement or personal well-being.

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Gary Marvin Davison Comments

Page 9

The Sayles-Adams dissertation contributes nothing that is unexpected or new by comparison with other research.

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Gary Marvin Davison Comments

Pages 9-10

The Sayles-Adams dissertation contributes nothing to what we already know about the experience of people to whom the theories of intersectionality, Black feminist thought, and Critical Race Theory are pertinent.

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Gary Marvin Davison Comments

Page 11

The sentence, “The term Black and African American will be used interchangeably in this study, realizing there is a difference,” is problematic in terms of English usage.  The phrase, “realizing there is a difference,” has no antecedent subject, so that a better rendering would be as follows:

“Although some authors differentiate between the terms, ‘Black’ and ‘African American,’ as to precise meaning, the terms are similar as to the group of reference and will be used interchangeably in this dissertation.”

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Gary Marvin Davison Comments

Page 11

Sayles-Adams’s rendering of Critical Race Theory is imprecise. 

Critical Race Theory (CRT) is distinguished from other frameworks for discussing racism, discrimination, and marginalization in that CRT theorists assert that racism, discrimination, and marginalization are embedded in all governmental, social, and economic institutions in the United States. 

“Storytelling/counter-storytelling and naming one’s reality” are not part of the definition of CRT, but rather proposed ways to counter the narratives of those who control institutions.